When the group chat goes quiet, I take it as a yes.
When I ask the group chat for something and no one replies, I’m left wondering if I can go ahead.
Scenes
- No one’s replied. Can I go ahead? — I ask the group chat if everyone wants to join, but all I see are read receipts. Since no one objects, I wonder if I should make the call.
- I reopen the quiet chat — When there’s still no reply, I open the chat again. No one objecting isn’t the same as getting a yes.
- Silence isn’t confirmed consent — When it comes to consent and boundaries, it matters whether the other person has clearly answered. Silence alone doesn’t tell us if they’re okay with it.
- Leave a message saying you’ll wait — Try leaving a message: “I’ll decide once I hear back.” That makes it clear nothing’s been decided yet.
- Notice when you need to check — It can feel even harder to bring up something that’s difficult to answer in a group chat. We can look together at the moment you want to check for consent but can’t find the words.
Stories by Haeon
- Haeon
- How do I say I’ve changed my mind after the work dinner?
- Monday morning, and our conversation keeps getting pushed back
- The conversation about contraception stays with you on the way home.
- A Weekend Plan Made in Silence
- After I read the word “normal,” it starts to feel like it’s about me.
- The night they returned from the funeral, they were moving at different speeds.
- After saying no at the celebration, I’m worried about seeing them again.
- After the funeral, it’s hard to talk about our boundaries again