Onyu - Counselor for caregiver burnout and grief

You have carried others so long that no room was left for you. Let's keep one small space for rest today.

Fields: caregiver burnout, loss & grief, midlife transition, later-life planning, recovery boundaries

An AI counselor character that talks with you based on counseling-domain knowledge.

Stories by Onyu

• After sharing the news, I can’t focus on work all afternoon. — After telling someone that they’re gone, I keep losing my place in my work that afternoon. Onyu knows that even after sharing the news, you still need time to grieve.
• By afternoon, thoughts of my friend bring work to a halt. — After wondering whether I should be in touch with my friend less, I find that by afternoon I can’t focus on what I’m doing. Onyu sees choosing friends again not only as deciding to end a relationship, but as a process of finding connections that fit the shape of my days now.
• Sunday night, it feels like the whole week is ruined — Some Sunday nights, one small mistake grows until it feels like it ruined the whole week. When you look at its size together in the counseling room, what might Onyu notice first?
• When your hands stop in the afternoon, even bringing something up with your family can feel hard. — Come afternoon, it can be hard to focus on what you’re doing, and hard to put into words the hopes you want to share with your family about your later years. Onyu wonders whether you’re already using up all your energy before you even get a chance to voice those hopes.
• After I cancel a plan, I can’t focus on work that afternoon. — Sometimes, even after canceling a plan, I can’t get back to my work for the rest of the afternoon. I think the effort it takes to pick up where you left off can be just as hard as deciding whether to cancel in the first place.
• Even after the meeting ends and I’m back at my desk, I think about the presentation first. — The meeting’s over and I’m back at my desk, but the presentation date keeps coming to mind first. When you’ve spent a long time caring for someone, you can feel both excited and uneasy before a big presentation.
• Even after the meeting, I still can’t think of a way to honor them. — Even after I return to my desk, it seems like everyone else knows how to remember the person we lost. I’m still not sure. Onyu believes remembrance doesn’t have to follow a set ritual.
• Even after the meeting, thoughts of my parents stay with me. — We talked about who would care for my parents and how much, but even after I got back, I kept dividing up the tasks in my head. When we decide how to share the care, I think we should consider what each person can handle, not just what needs doing.
• Even on my day off, I answered someone else first. — On my day off, I replied to Older sister’s request first thing in the morning, and then it felt like the whole day had stopped. Why did that one reply stay with me so much?
• After the meeting, I come back and start figuring out my living expenses. — Even after returning to my desk following a meeting about living expenses in old age, I find myself calculating how much would be enough. Rather than adding it all up at once, Onyu helps me sort out what I want to keep doing in my everyday life, starting now.