I wait for a message even while eating dinner
Even with dinner ready, I put down my spoon whenever my phone buzzes. I think deciding when dinner gets to be yours comes before figuring out how to stop…
Scenes
- I check my messages even while eating — Each time I pick up my spoon after setting out dinner, I check my screen, afraid my phone might buzz. The food gets cold, and I reply right away.
- I feel uneasy if I put off replying — Worried the other person might feel hurt if I read their message late, I reply even while eating. Dinner keeps getting interrupted.
- Every notification brings dinner to a halt — When a message comes during dinner, I stop eating and reply. Even after sending it, I keep watching the screen for the next notification.
- Waiting stretches out when there’s no set limit — Setting boundaries around contact is about deciding when to receive and reply, rather than whether to cut contact. Without a clear limit, notifications end up deciding when you reply each evening.
- Start by setting a limit for one dinner — Today, silence notifications while you eat and jot down a message saying you’ll reply tomorrow. At first, you may keep wanting to check.
- We can look at evenings spent waiting for a message — We can look together at what first comes to mind while you’re not replying, starting with whatever stays with you. Take your time with each spoonful.
Stories by Onyu
- Onyu
- Even after the meeting, thoughts of my parents stay with me.
- Even on my day off, I answered someone else first.
- After the meeting, I come back and start figuring out my living expenses.
- Even after a meeting, I come home and have to explain why I need to rest.
- Just before clocking out, the clock reminds me of a request
- Gray hair reflected in the window on a rainy day
- Right before clocking out, I pause before canceling our plans
- Right before quitting time, just thinking about learning makes me check the clock.