Someone I haven’t heard from in a long time is asking for my home address
This is for you, whose hands freeze while choosing a reply between gladness and safety when someone long out of touch suddenly asks how you are and whether…
Scenes
- Should I share my address? — After saying they’re glad to hear from you, someone you haven’t heard from in a long time asks for your home address. You want to keep your reply short, but your hands freeze.
- Would I seem strange if I refused? — Thinking about how close we used to be, I worry I’ll seem suspicious. So I choose a reply that laughs off even an uncomfortable question.
- When they asked for my address, saying they were nearby — I opened the notification in the office break room. They said they were nearby and asked me to send my address, and you turned the screen off and on several times.
- Welcoming someone and letting them in are separate things — The time since you last met and the conditions for letting someone into your space now are different. If gladness decides your address for you, your boundary comes too late.
- Reply with a boundary instead of your address — Without sending your address, try replying, “Today doesn’t work. If we meet, let’s meet somewhere with other people.” Keep a record of any uncomfortable reaction.
- Not replying is also a boundary — Delaying your reply or not sharing your address does not mean you’ve ruined the relationship. First, I’ll check my safety in real life. Next comes keeping a record.
Stories by Suho
- Suho
- I used someone I knew as a go-between at the supermarket.
- Even after the family gathering, those words are still online.
- Someone I hadn’t heard from in a long time got in touch, and now I need to gather traces of the altered photos spreading.
- They keep offering me gifts even after I said no
- I want to wait before replying to my online friend
- As I get ready for work, that nickname comes back to me.
- I ended the video call at the red light.
- They’re asking me to send money. Should I save the conversation first?