When childhood comes up, we say less as we each search for an answer.
As they walk along a tree-lined path in fall, one person brings up childhood, and the other is quick to look for an answer.
Scenes
- Childhood comes up on a fall walk — One person talks about wanting to lean on their parents. The other doesn’t know what to say and looks down at their feet.
- Trying to comfort, we explain first — “Your parents must have had a hard time then, too,” comes first. The person who brought it up can’t say any more.
- There are things to hear before comforting our younger selves — Wanting to lean on each other as children doesn’t mean we’re weak. We may still hope to hear from someone close what we didn’t hear back then.
- Before answers, say, “I’m listening” — If it comes up again tonight, respond simply: “You must have felt so lonely then.” Wait a moment before adding an explanation.
- It’s okay if you don’t get it right the first time — Even if you started by explaining, you can pick it back up: “I think I rushed to answer. I want to hear more.”
Stories by Cheongun
- Cheongun
- At lunch, I want to choose my child’s career path for them.
- When I step out after washing and stand before the mirror, the comparisons in my family come back to me.
- After the meeting, the plans and the spur-of-the-moment ideas clash again.
- When we get home from work, the first thing we talk about at the door is caring for our parents.
- As we left the exam room, Mom asked first.
- We put off the decision again while doing the dishes
- I set aside money for my younger sibling from my first paycheck
- It’s hard to tell my parents I’m getting counseling.