When I sit by the bus window, even favors feel like my responsibility
Sitting by the bus window, I think again about the favor I was asked today. I search for a way to say no, then end up putting off my reply.
Scenes
- Only after I get on the bus does answering become difficult — When I sit by the bus window, the favor I was asked earlier comes back to me. I put off replying because I’m afraid saying no will change our relationship.
- One favor stays with me like a responsibility — They only asked for a favor, but I calculate as though failing to do it might shake the whole relationship. Those aren’t the same thing.
- I erase my boundaries for fear the relationship will waver — At the boundary of a relationship, I need to separate the other person’s request from what I’m responsible for. The closer we are, the more easily the two become tangled in one knot.
- Before I answer, I measure what belongs to me — Tonight, write on paper: ‘What the other person asked of me’ and ‘What I will take on.’ What remains between the two lines is your boundary right now.
- Saying no doesn’t mean rejecting the whole relationship — It’s okay if you can’t decide on an answer right away. Tell me whether you chose only the answer you could give next time, and how you felt then.
Stories by Yeonhwa
- Yeonhwa
- At the company dinner, I wonder if I can let go of an old habit.
- My heart feels torn on the way to work
- I was only being kind. Why am I being called a flirt?
- When payday comes, I count who likes whom more.
- The way people spend at work dinners keeps catching my attention.
- I keep thinking about the conversation that ended, every afternoon.
- On my way to work, I heard about a big expense.
- On their birthday morning, you hold back the greeting, afraid your feelings might show.