I set out one extra spoon
It was dinner for one, but I took out an extra spoon. After that, my hands kept moving first toward another place.
Yujin, who lives alone, keeps preparing someone else’s share first at her dinner table and in the empty spaces of her day.
At dinner alone, Yujin takes out two bowls of rice and two sets of utensils. Even after revisiting that scene in counseling, her hands move first toward another place, until she finally lets out the words she had been swallowing toward the empty chair.
A day when being alone feels lonelier
Rather than trying to get rid of loneliness, notice what your heart is asking for the moment someone comes to mind.
When you slowly look into the feelings you couldn’t hear while enduring things alone, you may see the kind next step you need right now.
If you also prepared someone else’s share first today, you don’t have to rush to turn that scene into a meaning. What moved first—the hands or the heart? How did your body feel?
Scenes
- 01 · The bowl came first The bowl came first — At 8:10 p.m., Yujin placed two bowls of instant rice on the table in her studio apartment. Even after setting one down, she placed an extra spoon at the seat across from her. Yujin: I’ll just eat one tomorrow.
- 02 · The seat left open The seat left open — The next day, Yujin showed a photo she had taken of the table the night before. Only one bowl was empty, and the spoon across from her was untouched. Dalbit: How did your body feel when you set out the extra spoon? Yujin: I don't know. It was only after letting go that I realized I was alone.
- 03 · Another lunch left untouched Another lunch left untouched — Three days later, at 1 p.m., Yujin picked up two triangle kimbap at the convenience store. She set one beside her and shifted slightly toward the empty chair. Yujin: If this is left over too, I can eat it tomorrow.
- 04 · A night with the words folded away A night with the words folded away — That night, Yujin wrote and deleted a message she had meant to send a friend. She turned her phone face down, looked at the empty chair, and began to speak as if to herself. Yujin: I didn’t want to eat alone today.
Stories by Dalbit
- Dalbit
- On Friday evening, I was left alone in a room with the light on.
- After saying you’re okay on your first day
- I get asked for favors every lunch break
- There’s someone you think of when you’re sick, but on payday, you hesitate.
- When I get back from a celebration, I start doubting the story I’ve made up about myself.
- At lunch on her first day, one chair was left empty
- After hearing my friend’s news, I fall behind at work
- On the way home, I keep thinking of the same old advice.