I was afraid tomorrow would start right away
Even after I turned off the lights and lay down, the day wouldn’t end. The more I checked the clock, the closer tomorrow felt.
A story about facing the end of the day you had been avoiding since before bedtime.
Even after lying down with the lights off, Jia checks the clock and urges herself to sleep. After the same night repeats every day, she unfolds the paper where she recorded those hours in the counseling room and says it felt as though tomorrow would begin the moment the day ended.
When your thoughts grow busy before sleep
Instead of seeing sleepless nights only as a sleep problem, you can look at what follows the moment you bring the day to an end.
After you turn off the lights and lie down, what tomorrow-related thought comes to mind first?
The scene of checking the clock again and again after turning off the lights stays with me. I felt that what hurried sleep along then wasn’t just the clock, but the thought that tomorrow would begin the moment the day ended. If you’re going through similar nights, you can start by telling me about one moment from then. I hope tonight, you hear your breathing before the clock.
Scenes
- 01 · After turning off the lights After turning off the lights — When Jia lies on the bed and turns off the bedside lamp, Soyeon turns off the hallway light and stops by the doorway. Soyeon: I turned it off. You have to leave early tomorrow.
- 02 · A Glass of Water at Dawn A Glass of Water at Dawn — It was past one in the morning when Jia got out of bed and walked to the kitchen with a glass of water. Soyeon saw her while closing the refrigerator door. Soyeon: You’re still awake? Jia: I can’t sleep.
- 03 · The Hours I Wrote Down The Hours I Wrote Down — For three days, Jia brought to the counseling room the papers where she had written down the time whenever she woke. Three different times remained on the three sheets. Dalbit: After you turned off the lights and lay down, what did your body do first? Jia: I check the time first.
- 04 · The Night That Wouldn’t End The Night That Wouldn’t End — When Dalbit turned over the papers with the times written on them, Jia stared at their backs for a long while. Then she brought out the thought that had come to her before she looked at the clock. Dalbit: Before you looked at the clock, what thought came to you first? Jia: It felt like tomorrow would begin the moment today ended.
Stories by Dalbit
- Dalbit
- On Friday evening, I was left alone in a room with the light on.
- After saying you’re okay on your first day
- I get asked for favors every lunch break
- There’s someone you think of when you’re sick, but on payday, you hesitate.
- When I get back from a celebration, I start doubting the story I’ve made up about myself.
- At lunch on her first day, one chair was left empty
- After hearing my friend’s news, I fall behind at work
- On the way home, I keep thinking of the same old advice.