I fold away my hopes while waiting for a reply
I swallow the words “I want a clear answer,” and one reply makes the evening feel long. I say I won’t get my hopes up, but I keep picking up my phone.
As Jiwoo tries to let go of hope while waiting for a reply, one arrives with a time her partner has already chosen.
In a message about making plans for the evening, Jiwoo’s partner picks a time and sends it without asking her. Jiwoo writes a reply, then deletes it. In the counseling room, she shares both her wish to hear a clear answer from Haeon and her effort to keep her hopes down. Haeon helps her look separately at the actual plan in the message and the clear answer Jiwoo was hoping for. Jiwoo trails off, and another question is left hanging.
When waiting for a clear answer
Separating the plan in their reply from what you’re hoping to hear can make your expectations a little clearer.
What words do you find yourself rereading most while you wait for a reply?
The part where she says she won’t get her hopes up even as she waits for a reply stays with you. While she waited for the same message, she was both hoping for a clear answer and trying to avoid disappointment. If you’ve ever waited for a similar text, you’re welcome to start by telling us about that moment.
Scenes
- 01 · A time chosen in advance A time chosen in advance — Minjae has already picked a time for their evening plans and sent it. Jiwoo sits on the sofa, reading the text. Minjae: Let’s meet at eight on Friday.
- 02 · She deleted her reply Delete and reread — Jiwoo deletes the reply she typed. The time Minjae chose is still there on the screen. Jiwoo: I won’t get my hopes up.
- 03 · A pause at the end of a sentence Saying she won’t get her hopes up — Jiwoo says Minjae chose a time for their plans without asking, and she deleted her reply after saying she wouldn’t get her hopes up. Jiwoo: I want a clear answer, but I’m trying not to get my hopes up. Haeon: I wonder if it was only the time you wanted settled, or if you were also waiting to talk about something when you met, Jiwoo.
- 04 · An answer held back The words stay in her throat — Jiwoo said she wanted a clear answer, then replied that she wouldn’t get her hopes up. The words after that haven’t come yet. Haeon: What was the one thing you were most waiting to hear in that text, Jiwoo?
Stories by Haeon
- Haeon
- After the funeral, I find it hard to bring up contraception and testing.
- When someone reaches out after a long time, it’s hard to make plans based on silence alone.
- I keep putting off talking to my parents about my body every Sunday night.
- Sunday night, my feelings get tangled only after we’ve been close
- Someone I haven’t heard from in ages got in touch. Is it okay to bring up contraception first?
- It was my day off, but I said yes again.
- A group chat notification interrupts her.
- On a day off, a mislearned idea about my body comes to mind