I see caregiving before I see my own face

Scenes

• When I stand in front of the mirror, I don’t know where I’ve gone — Even after caring for someone all day and washing up, my face in the mirror looks unfamiliar.
• When I try to look at my face, tomorrow’s tasks come to mind first — When caregiving is still with you even during a moment of rest, looking after yourself gets pushed aside first. It’s not because you’re lazy.
• While wiping the mirror, I start tidying the family’s things again — The hand wiping water spots from the mirror after a shower stops. Soon after, it clears away the family’s things from the sink first.
• Even when caregiving ends, my body is still on duty — Caregiving burnout doesn’t come only from having too much to do. It lingers longer when you can’t step out of the role of constantly keeping watch, even after caregiving ends.
• Look briefly at just one part of your body in the mirror — Today, look only at one part of your body, like your eyebrows or the back of your hand, instead of caregiving. Even if you don’t feel better right away, notice the time when you come back into your own view.
• I don’t have to put caregiving down to see myself — Looking at yourself once in the mirror isn’t the same as abandoning caregiving. It’s gently checking the place in yourself you’ve left empty for a long time.