Today’s Story

Scenes

• One word from my spouse brings work to a stop — After reading my spouse’s “We need to talk tonight,” I get stuck trying to figure out what it means.
• I start by looking for what I did wrong — Even when I try to get back to work, I keep reopening the screen, imagining the look on my spouse’s face and the answers I might hear that evening.
• I write a reply, then delete it again — I turn the phone over, then open it again three minutes later. While I write and delete the reply, the first line of the email stays unchanged.
• A few words can mean more than one thing — A single remark between spouses can carry both a request and hurt feelings. If you work out the meaning and reply alone, the time and topic you actually need can get pushed aside.
• Set a time to meet before sorting out what it means — Ask what time you can talk for ten minutes today. Even if your feelings don’t settle right away, you’ll have a time to wait for.
• Even after you decide what to say, you don’t feel at ease right away — Still, you can step away from the place where you were passing judgment alone. First, the two of you need to look toward the same time and begin speaking.