Before the subway doors close, take a photo first

Scenes

• I want to show them again — When a nice scene appears before the subway doors close, your finger moves first to send it to them.
• You think of who will receive it before the photo — Let’s pause and sort out whether you miss sending the photo, or the response you used to get afterward. The two feelings can seem tangled together.
• I take it, then delete it without sending — Sunlight fell across the subway window on the way to work, so you took a photo. You started to send it as you used to, then closed the screen and looked toward the next-stop sign.
• It may not be only the person you miss — After a breakup, your body may reach first for the small things you used to share. So if you immediately read the urge to reach out as a wish to reunite, your feelings can become even more confusing.
• Before sending, write down what you wanted to share — When a photo you want to send tonight comes to mind, write just one line instead of sending it. Notice whether it was the scene, the reply, or the person you wanted to share.
• Even on days you want to reach out, the answer isn’t decided right away — A day without sending the photo doesn’t mean you’ve given up on getting back together. You can first look at missing the scene and wanting to see the person again as two separate feelings.